Bad News, Good News and the Inbetween

I have always hated the delay when someone has news - good or bad - to share - I don't like the dread filled anticipation and not-knowing. So I was [finally] told yesterday that I will not have my job after the end of this school year, it was good to finally know. I've been anticipating this for nearly two months now, feeling deep down inside that I was not going to be teaching at my current school after June...and I honestly went into the meeting where I was told thinking that either way - lose the job or keep it - I was going to be hearing something I didn't want to hear. The job has had drawbacks - ever since I took it I have struggled to be joyful there. It was never a good fit...and it is hard to fight for something that you don't love. Even though there would have been less pressure financially if I'd kept the job, I would have been hard to feel obligated to continue to do something I have not felt right about.

It is easy to say now that the standards I have for teaching and education are not shared by the powers that be at the school. I have been frustrated teaching students who are pushed through a sequence of classes even though they have not been passing the classes or learning the skills they need. In many ways it all boils down to politics - there is pressure to meet "AYP" and to meet standardized testing requirements, but true learning has in many cases been sacrificed. I suppose I held on through my frustration because I hoped to see things change. Now it is not my problem to solve, it never really was, two years at the school was not enough time to affect the culture of the school in a lasting way. I have taught students who have touched my life, and I hopefully have touched some of their lives...that I can take with me. Again, at least I now know what is going to happen and I can begin to make other plans.

Because I am on a 12 month contract I still have 5 months of income in front of me, and it looks like my best option after that (as I ride out this bad economy) will be to substitute teach. So I have been a whirlwind of emotions for the last day, going back and forth between relief that I don't have to do a job that I wasn't happy with anymore, and fear about the financial fall out of this change. The husband has been extremely supportive - he's been very positive and has set a tone that is confident. I guess these things can reinforce a relationship (or not!), I'm grateful to have such a wonderful partner.

On the good news end I have several things to share...my sewing classes start next week, the classes are complimentary with the purchase of my sewing machine. I am looking forward to learning a few new tricks and meeting others who enjoy sewing.

Also, I had a little time outside in the garden today...I finally planted my male and female kiwi plants - they are now along the new fence 8 feet from each other. They should be able to trellis nicely on the fence and be close enough for cross pollination to occur.

I also spent a little time with my tomatoes, giving them another deep watering and checking out their progress. I officially have flowers on not one but two plants - they must like their warm little tent! I will be stoked if I can pull off tomatoes in Washington - friends (that have lived here longer than I have) say not to get my hopes up, but I can't seem to help myself, in a way my tomatoes are one of the best things I have going right now...right?! If I can get them to grow here then the small issue of being unemployed is nothing I can't handle!

Okay another bit of good news to share on the "chicken front" - their coop is coming along splendidly - no small thank you to the husband for his hard work. It received a coat of paint - barn red - yesterday. Today the trim was painted white and roofing completed (My little chicks are going to be living in style and security - their roof is rated to last 30 years!) A recent development to the coop was that it also was wired for a light to be used during the dark winter months - hopefully to keep the ladies a'layin' all through the cold months.

My last bit of news today falls into the "inbetween" category - not specifically good or bad. My dear friend Amber, had two surgeries today. The first was a bilateral mastectomy, the second an immediate reconstruction. She has been on my heart all day - I wish again that I lived closer to her. When you read this Amber, know that my prayers have been whispered on your behalf today. You inspire me and have helped me keep life's bumps and bruises in perspective.